Women in a Room - Is a woman’s opinion “the miniskirt of the internet”?
Last night I attended a Social Media Week event run by Women In A Room. The title of the event was Is a woman’s opinion “the miniskirt of the internet”? – a reference to Laurie Penny’s Independent article last year discussing the abuse that she and other women have received online for airing their opinions. The discussion for the evening was to ‘talk about whether social media is useful and empowering, or a risky business’.
It was an enjoyable evening but one which didn’t quite follow the discussion path I’d expected. The Laurie Penny piece was certainly controversial when written and was picked up by many writers and publications such as The Guardian, the New Statesman and The Spectator. It sparked a #mencallmethings meme and triggered blog posts such as my own. I’ll admit I came prepared and hoping for a lively debate on whether women’s voices are silenced online, or their experiences dismissed. What I got was more of a positive discussion on the benefits of engaging in online communities.
I’m not sure, given the premise of the night,that the two speakers were best chosen. The evening started with both introducing themselves and their experiences online, and a short discussion of the issues lead by one of the organisers Katy Beale, along with comments from the floor. The speakers both seemed to have very positive experiences online, which is great for them, but seemed not to acknowledge that for some, this isn’t always the case. Kate Bussmann (writer, editor and compiler of A Twitter Year: 365 Days in 140 Characters [Bloomsbury]) discussed how cautious she is in terms of what she puts online, and how you can protect yourself. For her work this may be true, but for journalists, human rights campaigners and feminist activists I’m not sure this was helpful and almost smacked of victim-blaming – you put yourself above the parapet so can expect to be hit. She also felt that by giving profile to the people who call you things, you are merely giving them air and worse, by retweeting things they’d said (the C word for instance) you are merely showing future employers for example that you use the C word – she felt we need to be mindful not to appear aggressive. This provoked something for a reaction from the floor as one attendee (who also wrote a blog post on the night) felt this was akin to rape victims being told that ‘public knowledge of the rape will reflect badly on them’ . Aside from the blaming angle, I just felt that sometimes there’s a time and place to certainly be assertive (if not aggressive) online and that telling women, especially if they’re involved in politics or activism, to moderate their tone to avoid attracting flak isn’t particularly constructive. I don’t think women should be afraid to speak out.
Julie Howell (a founder of Jooly’s Joint and now a social media trainer and mentor to women in technology) seemed to agree with much of what Kate said, although as a disability rights campaigner she probably puts her head up and speaks out more. Her response was to be ‘robust’ She doesn’t take shit from anyone and won’t engage with trolls or people who are out to target her. I respect this to an extent - feeding the trolls is a fruitless endeavour - but again, I don’t think she accepted that for some women the reaction they get online is threatening and frightening. In those cases, she advocated going straight to the police and this is often appropriate. She also said she didn’t advocate ‘vigilantism’, which she inferred to mean engaging with those online who hold different opinions or calling them out publicly. I think the recent campaign against the Unilad website which resulted in both its closure and its Facebook page, showed that concerted action is sometimes the way to go. Interestingly when the Laurie Penny piece was raised by an attendee she seemed to dismiss it entirely on the basis of Laurie also being capable of dishing it out. Having the article that was intended to inspire the night’s discussion dismissed in one sentence was a shame as the point I raised was related to how I felt that when women sometimes contribute to debate online they’re often told that their experiences don’t happen or that they’re exaggerated. I was left with the impression that Julie feels the same way.
After the relatively short panel discussion we split into groups to discuss the issues involved. While our group initially started discussing harassment online the conversation quickly moved on to more positive experiences. Many of the women in the group had stories to tell of time when online communities helped them – from technical queries to meeting new work colleagues. The joy of social media and Twitter in particular is also that you can, quite directly, get in touch with people who you would ordinarily not have access to – a point raised by one of the organisers Rachel Coldicutt. Some of the women in the group also felt that being a woman gave them an advantage in being heard as they weren’t competing with men in the same way as they competed with each other. It was an interesting discussion and given my expectations of the evening it was pleasant to have a chat about the positives of social media rather than getting worked up over the challenges.
Overall however, I do feel that the evening was a lost opportunity to discuss difficulties experienced online. I gather some of the other groups did talk about moderation in communities which is great, but I suppose I’d have liked to have heard more about how women deal with being silenced, or even if more women do experience this. I’m willing to accept however that this assessment of the evening may well be coloured by my own preconceptions and interests so I’m glad to hear that others really enjoyed it. It was all very enjoyable and pleasant so I can’t complain on that front and sometimes it’s nice to take a break from getting all worked up and instead remember the positives that using your voice on the internet can bring. It certainly didn’t put me off attending future Women In A Room events.
